Post by Kano Hans on Jul 17, 2018 6:09:16 GMT
Character Name: Kano Theophrastus Hans
Character Age: 200 (SHEER WILLPOWER KEEPS THIS OLD BASTARD ALIVE)
Character Gender: Pure Dude (Three freaking Y chromosomes)
Character Appearance: Kano is the epitome of sheer manliness, even in the presence of old age. His physique like that of a bull on steroids that didn't skip arm or leg day. His wrinkles themselves have muscles from how often he flexes, straightening his skin and making him look much younger. To cover this two hundred pound hunk of man-meat is an awesome prune colored coat to hide his various tools and items, as well as his best friend Dully Hans The XLIV. Underneath this coat is what can only be described as Indiana Jones' dress suit consisting of a tan dress shirt and pants, mixed with grass green tie and small red handkerchief in his shirt pocket. To cover his glorious white hair is a sick ass cheetah print rain hat made of the finest of dollar store felts, hand-crafted by Kano in his free time while his ship's systems were offline due to something in it fucking up somewhere down the line. Holding up his weight and making him look like a straight pimp is his cane, carved from hickory and hollowed in the middle with the pores of the wood opened to allow for the fastest ass whooping action. The very end of his death stick is a metal peg with a small indent "Kano's Bitch" which temporarily allows for the branding of those who need to be taught a lesson, best done on the cheek. To finish it all off, he is almost always found sitting in a stolen electric wheelchair designed for those who are unable to walk. On the back of the chair it says hospital, and above that is a marked out name, written over in black ink saying "Kano's" over the name of the hospital it was hijacked from. On special occasions, Kano may come to places off of his wheelchair and be walking around, however, his sheer lack of fuck giving keeps this interaction to a minimum to keep his heart from exploding into a pile of sawdust mixed with fruit loops. His doctor was afraid he would get Osteoporosis, Cognitive Impairment, Arthritis, and the other symptoms of old age. However, as if he was indestructible, he proved everyone wrong and continues to ride on his trash barge in the sky, yelling at the neighborhood kids and sewing as he steals garbage in space.
Character Digivice Appearance: An ancient device of a long since forgotten time period, it is the digivice of Kano Hans. Having been found in the garbage by the old man, it glowed and thus he knew it probably could be worth a bit of money. He never actually got around to hocking it, but he was really tempted to do so. It is shaped like an old Nokia 3310 cellphone with a few cracks here and there. A small hello kitty sticker from hundreds of years ago is permanently stamped onto the back of it, and the ink for the number nine is faded away. He doesn't actually know it works, and just holds onto it like a good luck charm.
Character Personality: If someone were to summerize Kano's attitude in the form of a movie character, it would be the Terminator. Kano being the buffiest, toughiest, and stuffiest bastard in the galaxy. His might knows no bounds outside of the reach of his walker. Fearing only spiders and hot sauce bottles (who wouldn't be?), Kano is a special breed of individual who possesses the famous trait of an indestructible wit. His charm and personality like a flame for moths to fly to, only to burn to death upon figuring out the flame they flew to now wants to suplex them and shatter their spines for a mid-summers tea party game. Kano has no regrets in life, and his only disappointments were his grandkids. His likes include wrestling, flexing in public places, Hello Kitty, being friends with people who do not want to stop him from breaking backs, trash, getting older and hitting on younger women despite the age gap. Even if he was an adult before their grandparents were even a thought.
Finally, as the Piece De Resistance of Kano's pure personality, he is the manliest thing you'll ever meet. His gentlemen nature paired with his unruly desire to shatter bones and tip hats, break necks and open up doors for the ladies, fight other people's Mega level digimon with his bare hands and pull the chair out for a woman at a party. If it wouldn't naturally have three Y chromosomes like himself, it shouldn't exist in his eyes. All pansy stuff is herecy, and a true man likes whatever he wants without pressure or distaste.
As the cherry on top, Kano is not afraid to die. In fact, he is waiting for the Grim Reaper to come get him so he can kick it's ass, and then find whatever being exists in whatever underworld exists and beat their ass too. Just to show his dominance and pure manliness. Every night, he goes to sleep with a baseball bat just for the moment he has a heart attack and suddenly has to go all final fight on the ghost of christmas future.
Character History: Born two hundred years ago to two unloving parents, he was left by himself in space to be passed around from home to home and family to family in hopes of somehow finding someone to love him. Because of this, he dedicated his life to being the healthiest being in the universe, and began to pressure his muscles more and more until he BECAME the strongest in the universe. While he has not put his strength to the test, he has not found anyone to disrupt his title of the SWOLest man in existence. As he grew up, getting buffer and buffer, protein shake after protein shake, he somehow found himself upon the Space Ark with the intent on becoming a professional wrestler. Instead, he managed to meet up with his long lost cousin named Zain Hans who had been breeding their ancient ancestor's partner digimon. Kano ignored the plump babies, and befriended an old ass looking Tsukaimon that barely spoke and constantly tried to bite him.
Out of sheer spite and anger, Kano tamed the wild beast that was Dully Hans The XLIV, becoming best friends with the mangy beast and making it his guard dog of sorts. This would, however, prove not so effective when he actually got into trouble with the Space Ark's government. Escaping on a stolen Garbage Truck, he fled into the vastness of space with the intent on only returning the vehicle when he came back for his pension and retirement funds. He only plans to retire on his death bed.
Forty years have passed since he stole that space ship on that fateful day, leading to countless adventures, such as:
SUPER EXTREME KNITTING CLASS: Where Kano learned to Knit from the wise and smart Miss Albert, the galaxy's best knitting teacher.
KANO READS THE NEWSPAPER: Where Kano stole the news from a house, only to find out it was last weeks paper and he didn't have to worry about anything that happened!
And so much more. With even more to come. Nothing will stop Kano on his journey to catch them al- I mean, be the strongest saiy- I mean... uh... BE THE BEST DIGIMON MASTER.
Starter Digimon: Dully Hans The XLIV
Starter Digimon Age: Old
Starter Digimon Gender: ...Not Entirely Sure
Starter Digimon Race: Tsukaimon
Starter Digimon Appearance modifier: One wing is larger than the other preventing flight due to generations of excessive inbreeding.
Starter Digimon Personality: To explain Dully Hans is to explain why a lion kills to eat. It's extremely difficult and possibly convoluted, answered merely by the response of 'nature'. Dully Hans is only viable as a rabid animal with an opinion. His tendancies to bite people in their privates and tear up furniture while also somehow being sane enough to hold a decent conversation about the ethics of digimon politics has been the thought of discussion among scientists for many years. Mixing that with his obsession with spoons and all kinds of signs, including street signs, license plates, neon signs, and so forth, he is a creative digimon to meet. That is, if you aren't on the receiving end of a 'sick ball'.
Starter Digimon History: Bred from an ancient line of Tsukaimon originating from one named Dully Hans long ago. Not much is known about his history... or anything... besides the fact that he is ALSO a really old digimon. Possibly rabid. Tufts of fur here and there are missing, and he has snaggle teeth on both sides of his face. Other than that, he is a mystery.
Ship Name:SSI-Garbage Transport The Troll Toll
Ship Appearance: A three generations old space garbage truck stolen by Kano years and years ago as a way to escape everyone and live off on his own like a true man. It only works half the time and rarely goes where you want it to, but it has all the necessities. It's empty in it's foreend, where normally millions of pounds of trash would be, and instead he has put down rather fun areas to play around or do stuff in to keep his old mind at ease. The roof of the open foreend is a gravity shield of sorts, preventing oxygen and gravity from escaping into the depths of Zero Gravity, while also being a barrier that allows small probes to fly in and out of to gather trash and space junk from wrecks he visits. The ship itself is a school bus yellow with black markings on it, detailing it to be a private garbage vessal with outdated tags and registration. On the side in big black paint is Kano's name, massive and impossible to avoid if looking at the ship.
Ship Functionability: An intergalactic Garbage Desposal Ship
Ship Lay-out: Describe your ship layout or maybe tell us how many rooms it has? Describe it as much as you want too!
Character Age: 200 (SHEER WILLPOWER KEEPS THIS OLD BASTARD ALIVE)
Character Gender: Pure Dude (Three freaking Y chromosomes)
Character Appearance: Kano is the epitome of sheer manliness, even in the presence of old age. His physique like that of a bull on steroids that didn't skip arm or leg day. His wrinkles themselves have muscles from how often he flexes, straightening his skin and making him look much younger. To cover this two hundred pound hunk of man-meat is an awesome prune colored coat to hide his various tools and items, as well as his best friend Dully Hans The XLIV. Underneath this coat is what can only be described as Indiana Jones' dress suit consisting of a tan dress shirt and pants, mixed with grass green tie and small red handkerchief in his shirt pocket. To cover his glorious white hair is a sick ass cheetah print rain hat made of the finest of dollar store felts, hand-crafted by Kano in his free time while his ship's systems were offline due to something in it fucking up somewhere down the line. Holding up his weight and making him look like a straight pimp is his cane, carved from hickory and hollowed in the middle with the pores of the wood opened to allow for the fastest ass whooping action. The very end of his death stick is a metal peg with a small indent "Kano's Bitch" which temporarily allows for the branding of those who need to be taught a lesson, best done on the cheek. To finish it all off, he is almost always found sitting in a stolen electric wheelchair designed for those who are unable to walk. On the back of the chair it says hospital, and above that is a marked out name, written over in black ink saying "Kano's" over the name of the hospital it was hijacked from. On special occasions, Kano may come to places off of his wheelchair and be walking around, however, his sheer lack of fuck giving keeps this interaction to a minimum to keep his heart from exploding into a pile of sawdust mixed with fruit loops. His doctor was afraid he would get Osteoporosis, Cognitive Impairment, Arthritis, and the other symptoms of old age. However, as if he was indestructible, he proved everyone wrong and continues to ride on his trash barge in the sky, yelling at the neighborhood kids and sewing as he steals garbage in space.
Character Digivice Appearance: An ancient device of a long since forgotten time period, it is the digivice of Kano Hans. Having been found in the garbage by the old man, it glowed and thus he knew it probably could be worth a bit of money. He never actually got around to hocking it, but he was really tempted to do so. It is shaped like an old Nokia 3310 cellphone with a few cracks here and there. A small hello kitty sticker from hundreds of years ago is permanently stamped onto the back of it, and the ink for the number nine is faded away. He doesn't actually know it works, and just holds onto it like a good luck charm.
Character Personality: If someone were to summerize Kano's attitude in the form of a movie character, it would be the Terminator. Kano being the buffiest, toughiest, and stuffiest bastard in the galaxy. His might knows no bounds outside of the reach of his walker. Fearing only spiders and hot sauce bottles (who wouldn't be?), Kano is a special breed of individual who possesses the famous trait of an indestructible wit. His charm and personality like a flame for moths to fly to, only to burn to death upon figuring out the flame they flew to now wants to suplex them and shatter their spines for a mid-summers tea party game. Kano has no regrets in life, and his only disappointments were his grandkids. His likes include wrestling, flexing in public places, Hello Kitty, being friends with people who do not want to stop him from breaking backs, trash, getting older and hitting on younger women despite the age gap. Even if he was an adult before their grandparents were even a thought.
Finally, as the Piece De Resistance of Kano's pure personality, he is the manliest thing you'll ever meet. His gentlemen nature paired with his unruly desire to shatter bones and tip hats, break necks and open up doors for the ladies, fight other people's Mega level digimon with his bare hands and pull the chair out for a woman at a party. If it wouldn't naturally have three Y chromosomes like himself, it shouldn't exist in his eyes. All pansy stuff is herecy, and a true man likes whatever he wants without pressure or distaste.
As the cherry on top, Kano is not afraid to die. In fact, he is waiting for the Grim Reaper to come get him so he can kick it's ass, and then find whatever being exists in whatever underworld exists and beat their ass too. Just to show his dominance and pure manliness. Every night, he goes to sleep with a baseball bat just for the moment he has a heart attack and suddenly has to go all final fight on the ghost of christmas future.
Character History: Born two hundred years ago to two unloving parents, he was left by himself in space to be passed around from home to home and family to family in hopes of somehow finding someone to love him. Because of this, he dedicated his life to being the healthiest being in the universe, and began to pressure his muscles more and more until he BECAME the strongest in the universe. While he has not put his strength to the test, he has not found anyone to disrupt his title of the SWOLest man in existence. As he grew up, getting buffer and buffer, protein shake after protein shake, he somehow found himself upon the Space Ark with the intent on becoming a professional wrestler. Instead, he managed to meet up with his long lost cousin named Zain Hans who had been breeding their ancient ancestor's partner digimon. Kano ignored the plump babies, and befriended an old ass looking Tsukaimon that barely spoke and constantly tried to bite him.
Out of sheer spite and anger, Kano tamed the wild beast that was Dully Hans The XLIV, becoming best friends with the mangy beast and making it his guard dog of sorts. This would, however, prove not so effective when he actually got into trouble with the Space Ark's government. Escaping on a stolen Garbage Truck, he fled into the vastness of space with the intent on only returning the vehicle when he came back for his pension and retirement funds. He only plans to retire on his death bed.
Forty years have passed since he stole that space ship on that fateful day, leading to countless adventures, such as:
SUPER EXTREME KNITTING CLASS: Where Kano learned to Knit from the wise and smart Miss Albert, the galaxy's best knitting teacher.
KANO READS THE NEWSPAPER: Where Kano stole the news from a house, only to find out it was last weeks paper and he didn't have to worry about anything that happened!
And so much more. With even more to come. Nothing will stop Kano on his journey to catch them al- I mean, be the strongest saiy- I mean... uh... BE THE BEST DIGIMON MASTER.
Starter Digimon: Dully Hans The XLIV
Starter Digimon Age: Old
Starter Digimon Gender: ...Not Entirely Sure
Starter Digimon Race: Tsukaimon
Starter Digimon Appearance modifier: One wing is larger than the other preventing flight due to generations of excessive inbreeding.
Starter Digimon Personality: To explain Dully Hans is to explain why a lion kills to eat. It's extremely difficult and possibly convoluted, answered merely by the response of 'nature'. Dully Hans is only viable as a rabid animal with an opinion. His tendancies to bite people in their privates and tear up furniture while also somehow being sane enough to hold a decent conversation about the ethics of digimon politics has been the thought of discussion among scientists for many years. Mixing that with his obsession with spoons and all kinds of signs, including street signs, license plates, neon signs, and so forth, he is a creative digimon to meet. That is, if you aren't on the receiving end of a 'sick ball'.
Starter Digimon History: Bred from an ancient line of Tsukaimon originating from one named Dully Hans long ago. Not much is known about his history... or anything... besides the fact that he is ALSO a really old digimon. Possibly rabid. Tufts of fur here and there are missing, and he has snaggle teeth on both sides of his face. Other than that, he is a mystery.
Ship Name:
Ship Appearance: A three generations old space garbage truck stolen by Kano years and years ago as a way to escape everyone and live off on his own like a true man. It only works half the time and rarely goes where you want it to, but it has all the necessities. It's empty in it's foreend, where normally millions of pounds of trash would be, and instead he has put down rather fun areas to play around or do stuff in to keep his old mind at ease. The roof of the open foreend is a gravity shield of sorts, preventing oxygen and gravity from escaping into the depths of Zero Gravity, while also being a barrier that allows small probes to fly in and out of to gather trash and space junk from wrecks he visits. The ship itself is a school bus yellow with black markings on it, detailing it to be a private garbage vessal with outdated tags and registration. On the side in big black paint is Kano's name, massive and impossible to avoid if looking at the ship.
Ship Functionability: An intergalactic Garbage Desposal Ship
Ship Lay-out: Describe your ship layout or maybe tell us how many rooms it has? Describe it as much as you want too!
